Deciding to undergo IVF with donor eggs is a major step on your fertility journey. But more tough choices are to follow. How can you find an egg donor that’s perfect for you? When it comes to picking an egg donor where do you start? We have broken down this decision-making process into three questions that you can ask yourself at different steps in this egg donor search process.
1. Are you emotionally ready to move forward with donated eggs?
Simple question, tough answer. Using donated eggs to conceive is not easy decision for anyone. By this time, couples have often gone through many unsuccessful treatments attempts already, which can be both physically and emotionally hard on both partners. Do you need more time to reflect, think, or maybe even grieve? If so, take the necessary time to do so and go easy on yourself before making big decisions. On the other hand, some may be very ready to go on to the next step and don’t want to wait any longer.
2. Are frozen donor eggs right for you—or fresh?
Should you try to go through a cycle with fresh donor eggs from a synced cycle with an egg donor? Should you work with an egg donor agency that recruits egg donors and matches you? We’ve discussed who uses frozen donor eggs and why on our blog. If a larger number of eggs is important to you for a larger potential family, then fresh donor eggs might be a better choice.
However, if you’re tired of delays and you’re not interested in a large number of additional eggs or embryos (and higher costs), frozen donor eggs may be a better choice. You can receive a set number of donor eggs that have already been retrieved from fully tested and screened egg donors, ready to use on your schedule. You don’t have to wait for an egg donor to undergo screening and then synchronize her schedule with yours. There’s also a lower risk of unpleasant last minutes surprises, such as a failed screening test or a less-than-hoped-for number of retrieved eggs from your egg donor.
3. What are the qualities in an egg donor that are most important to you?
Early in their egg donor search many wonder “How to choose an egg donor?”. There should be some baseline requirements to have in place before you get bogged down with details like your egg donor’s eye color and personality. At the basic level, egg donors should go through a rigorous screening process for physical and mental health, family medical history, genetics and much more. It should go without saying that the most important quality is passing this screening process. With frozen donor eggs, you can be assured that the donors have already been screened; this frees you to focus on other qualities that are important to you. Some criteria you might think about include:
- Appearance: height, hair color, eye color. Many donor egg recipients are interested in donors with similar physical features.
- Personal background: education, personality, career. Does a donor’s values and personality mesh with yours?
- Background: ethnic, religious. Again, many families look for a donor with a background that matches their own.
To get a sense of what you can look for, see our egg donor search (free to browse egg donor profiles). You’ll see much more than the superficial. You can search on ethnicity, appearance, blood type, and more. In the egg donor profiles of these very special young women, you can see personal essays, personality types (including Myers-Briggs), childhood photos, information about hobbies and interests, and much more.
It may seem overwhelming to find an egg donor that’s perfect for you and looking for egg donors may take a substantial amount of time in order to find the right one. By answering these three questions, you can drill down to the donor that meshes with you and family. Check out our post from a real-life mom on how she found her egg donor. Have questions about our screening process, our egg donors, or our search criteria? Contact us with your questions, let us help you find the right egg donor.